I've been reading Philip Yancey's What's So Amazing About Grace? It's funny how I often find myself reading books that have special relevance to my life at that moment (could it be a God-thing?). Anyway, this book is very interesting to me because of the things I talked about in my Unity...and LOVE post. Here's an extract from the book:
When the renowned theologian Karl Barth visited the University of Chicago, students and scholars crowded around him. At a press conference, one asked, "Dr. Barth, what is the most profound truth you have learned in your studies?" Without hesitation he replied, "Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so." I agree with Karl Barth. Why, then, do I so often act as if I am trying to earn that love? Why do I have such trouble accepting it?
Well, it's nice to know I'm not the only one who has felt that way! That's exactly what I realised I had been trying to do -- earn God's love. I was trying to serve Him because I thought that's what I was supposed to do, rather than because than to please the God I love. Now, reading this book, everything has special significance. God's unconditional love for me is directly tied with his grace -- a word that was just a word to me a week ago, but which I know understand a whole heap better.
Reading about grace, I really do find it amazing. I mean, what's more mind-blowing than the fact that "there is nothing we can do to make God love us more. There is nothing we can do to make God love us less" (quote from the book). As Yancey says, "By instinct I feel I must do something in order to be accepted. Grace sounds a startling note of contradiction, of liberation."
The fact that God accepts me and forgives me, and that that is true no matter how unworthy I am, really is amazing. And yes, liberating. In the best sense of the word.
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
Monday, December 31, 2007
Bible colleges
I was thinking about Bible colleges yesterday (because I think I'd like to go to one someday) and this thought popped into my head:
Why do people have to pay to learn at a Bible college what they should be able to learn for free in a church???
It seems wrong to me. In the early church there were no such things as Bible colleges -- everyone just learned from each other within the churches. So why do we need special (expensive) institutions to teach us what we should be learning at church?
And more importantly, what can we do about it?
I guess that's just yet another thing for me to ponder. (Sigh...)
I found yet, yet another thing for me to ponder when I was reading a Christian newsletter/newspaper thing my dad had picked up at church. Going through it, I came across a photo of a starving African boy, the thinnest kid I have ever seen in my life. His legs (including his thighs) were as thin as my arms!!! Now of course everyone knows that that kind of thing happens. But I don't know about you, but seeing pictures of sad-eyed kids who are literally skin and bones just rips at my heart the way facts and figures can't. I want to do something to help, and I intend to donate some money to World Vision (which I've been meaning to do for a long time), but somehow it doesn't seem like much.
And then of course, third-world countries aren't the only places where there's poverty and hunger and sickness and hopelessness. What about closer to home? How can I make a difference right here in my own country?
Again, I think this is something churches need to do -- and I'm sure many do. But I'd like to see my own church do more than just sending money to missionaries. We should be reaching out to our own communities. And I'd feel a whole heap better if I had someone to lead me, because I don't know how to help on my own!
I guess I should talk to my pastor and find out what exactly our church is doing for our communities. Sigh (again). I suppose if we aren't doing anything the right thing for me to do would be to suggest we set something up...
Maybe I was right about that whole reformer thing.
Sigh.
...But after all, I did want to know how I could help!
Why do people have to pay to learn at a Bible college what they should be able to learn for free in a church???
It seems wrong to me. In the early church there were no such things as Bible colleges -- everyone just learned from each other within the churches. So why do we need special (expensive) institutions to teach us what we should be learning at church?
And more importantly, what can we do about it?
I guess that's just yet another thing for me to ponder. (Sigh...)
I found yet, yet another thing for me to ponder when I was reading a Christian newsletter/newspaper thing my dad had picked up at church. Going through it, I came across a photo of a starving African boy, the thinnest kid I have ever seen in my life. His legs (including his thighs) were as thin as my arms!!! Now of course everyone knows that that kind of thing happens. But I don't know about you, but seeing pictures of sad-eyed kids who are literally skin and bones just rips at my heart the way facts and figures can't. I want to do something to help, and I intend to donate some money to World Vision (which I've been meaning to do for a long time), but somehow it doesn't seem like much.
And then of course, third-world countries aren't the only places where there's poverty and hunger and sickness and hopelessness. What about closer to home? How can I make a difference right here in my own country?
Again, I think this is something churches need to do -- and I'm sure many do. But I'd like to see my own church do more than just sending money to missionaries. We should be reaching out to our own communities. And I'd feel a whole heap better if I had someone to lead me, because I don't know how to help on my own!
I guess I should talk to my pastor and find out what exactly our church is doing for our communities. Sigh (again). I suppose if we aren't doing anything the right thing for me to do would be to suggest we set something up...
Maybe I was right about that whole reformer thing.
Sigh.
...But after all, I did want to know how I could help!
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Confusion and reformation
I'm feeling very confused right now. I've just read 1 Corinthians 11:2-16, in which Paul commands the believers that the men should not cover their heads while "praying or prophesying" but women should cover their heads. Well, first of all this seems like a weird command to me, because what does it matter whether you're head is covered or not? (But on the other hand, we're supposed to obey God even if we don't understand His reasons.) Secondly, if we're supposed to be doing this, why aren't we?? How many women do you see wearing veils in church? Uh, none, unless they're getting married!
So what's with this anyway? I mean, my Bible has a note down the bottom of the page saying that some Bibles speak about "hair" rather than a "covering", but I went to this site (Let Her be Veiled) which looked at the original Greek, and whoever wrote the article reckoned that it definitely referred to a veil-like covering.
Well, I guess if we gals are supposed to wear veils in church it doesn't really bother me...if we're all doing it. But I can just imagine the weird looks I'd get if I walked into church with a shawl draped over my head. (Yeah, I know, I shouldn't mind that. But I am human!) I can also imagine the sort of response I'd get if I tried to encourage everyone else to do it too. Besides, it still seems like a funny command and before I do anything drastic I want to research different interpretations.
But it leads me on to something else. It got me thinking (especially what the guy was saying in the article I read) about what the Bible says in other places about how women shouldn't place so much store on beauty but spend their energies on becoming Godly women. Which makes me freak out a bit (especially after all the references to Jezebel and feminine pride and so on in that article) in case that means we're not supposed to worry about our appearance at all. Because I admit it freely, I'm entirely feminine (or maybe just human) in that I like to look nice whenever possible. And I like wearing jewelery and makeup. That surely isn't wrong? It's not like the Bible comes right out and says "Don't bother with nice clothes and throw away all your makeup and jewelery (etc)." I don't see why I can't take a few pains with my appearance and still focus on becoming a Godly woman. I mean, if that guy can throw Jezebel at me, why can't I just throw Esther right back?
I'm probably getting all freaked over nothing. I think I do that a lot. ;)
Anyway, I guess that's something I'll have to mull over for a while. I suppose I can't expect any quick answers when I'm wrestling both with not entirely clear verses and my own natural bias.
All this stuff has made me think that the girls at church would benefit from some sort of ministry thingy where the older women guide the younger ones in becoming Godly women. You know, teaching us about modesty and the Biblical role of women and so forth...dunno, it's just an idea.
In any case, with all these somewhat radical -- or at least out-of-the-ordinary -- ideas, I'm kind of wondering if I'm going to end up turning into a bit of a reformer. A scary possibility! ;)
So what's with this anyway? I mean, my Bible has a note down the bottom of the page saying that some Bibles speak about "hair" rather than a "covering", but I went to this site (Let Her be Veiled) which looked at the original Greek, and whoever wrote the article reckoned that it definitely referred to a veil-like covering.
Well, I guess if we gals are supposed to wear veils in church it doesn't really bother me...if we're all doing it. But I can just imagine the weird looks I'd get if I walked into church with a shawl draped over my head. (Yeah, I know, I shouldn't mind that. But I am human!) I can also imagine the sort of response I'd get if I tried to encourage everyone else to do it too. Besides, it still seems like a funny command and before I do anything drastic I want to research different interpretations.
But it leads me on to something else. It got me thinking (especially what the guy was saying in the article I read) about what the Bible says in other places about how women shouldn't place so much store on beauty but spend their energies on becoming Godly women. Which makes me freak out a bit (especially after all the references to Jezebel and feminine pride and so on in that article) in case that means we're not supposed to worry about our appearance at all. Because I admit it freely, I'm entirely feminine (or maybe just human) in that I like to look nice whenever possible. And I like wearing jewelery and makeup. That surely isn't wrong? It's not like the Bible comes right out and says "Don't bother with nice clothes and throw away all your makeup and jewelery (etc)." I don't see why I can't take a few pains with my appearance and still focus on becoming a Godly woman. I mean, if that guy can throw Jezebel at me, why can't I just throw Esther right back?
I'm probably getting all freaked over nothing. I think I do that a lot. ;)
Anyway, I guess that's something I'll have to mull over for a while. I suppose I can't expect any quick answers when I'm wrestling both with not entirely clear verses and my own natural bias.
All this stuff has made me think that the girls at church would benefit from some sort of ministry thingy where the older women guide the younger ones in becoming Godly women. You know, teaching us about modesty and the Biblical role of women and so forth...dunno, it's just an idea.
In any case, with all these somewhat radical -- or at least out-of-the-ordinary -- ideas, I'm kind of wondering if I'm going to end up turning into a bit of a reformer. A scary possibility! ;)
Friday, December 28, 2007
Unity...and LOVE
To follow on from my previous post (about how churches of different denominations should work together), I was surprised to discover that nearly 2000 years ago the church in Corinth had a similar problem. Check out what Paul wrote to them in 1 Corinthians 1:10-12:
I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought. My brothers, some from Chloe's household have informed me that there are quarrels among you. What I mean is this: One of you says, "I follow Paul"; another, "I follow Apollos"; another, "I follow Cephas"; still another, "I follow Christ."
I suppose you could say today that some follow Luther, others follow Calvin, others follow Wesley...etc. But I don't think that's the way it should be. There's a reason we're called Christians!
Well anyway, that's something for me (and you too, perhaps) to ponder on.
Changing the subject...I feel rather like life for me is a series of revelations (of varying significance). Like about six months ago I realised that leaps of faith are really, really worth it (I'll have to tell that story sometime I guess) and that I'm incredibly weak when I try to rely on myself -- but when I lean on God He makes me incredibly powerful. (I had to relearn that lesson a couple of times, but I think it's getting through to me now. :) ) My most recent "revelation" or life lesson is that God really loves me.
If you're a Christian and you know that I'm a Christian you're probably thinking, "Well, duh." And of course I already knew that God loves me. In my mind. But I guess I still felt like I had to be completely perfect, and that's a heavy weight to carry. I was getting stressed out over really tiny things in my effort to please God -- and basically going about it completely the wrong way. Not surprisingly, this lead to a somewhat severe case of discouragement. I was pretty miserable for a while, but on Boxing day I decided that filling my mind with escapist-fuel wasn't going to help anything and so went off by myself to wrestle this thing out. After a not-very-refreshing bout of tears, I started praying rather brokenly --
Oh man, I really am giving you my diary here.
Oh well, I guess I should finish the story. I started praying, but all I could say was "What am I supposed to do?" because I felt like I was falling far short of being a good Christian and everything. I was just saying this over and over, but then I felt as though I was given the answer: Nothing. You don't have to do anything.
Well, it's not like I heard an audible voice or anything, but I got the message clearly enough. And I was pretty amazed. I mean, here I was, beating myself up over stupid little things and trying to be Miss Perfect because I thought that's what I had to do, and here God's telling me, "Relax! I already love you!"
Yeah, I did know that, but I guess it never really got past my mind and to my heart, you know what I mean? Anyway, to make a long story short, I realised I had been acting like a legalistic idiot, trying to do everything on my own strength (told you I had to relearn that lesson a few times!) and that I was trying to be perfect for the wrong reason. It came clear to me that although, yes, I should try to live righteously, I should do it not out of obligation but out of love for God and a genuine desire to please Him. (Yeah, I hear you Christians saying "Yeah, duh" again, but remember that things aren't always so obvious when they're happening to you!) And I found that that's exactly what I wanted to do -- because (partly because He had revealed all this to me and had taken away the pressure I had been under, but mostly because He LOVED me -- *HAPPY FACE!!!!*) , I found I really loved God too.
So I'm really happy at the moment. (I know I won't stay on this high forever, but I really think that what I've learned is something that won't disappear even with the ups and downs of a teenager's emotional balance.) I'm really enjoying putting the command "whatever you do, do it to the glory of God" into practice, and I'm just loving God loving me (and I think He loves me loving Him too).
So I guess if I was to say anything to you lucky people who got to READ MY DIARY IN ALL IT'S EMOTIONAL DRAMA AND PAINFUL HONESTY, it would be this: God loves you. God loves you. God loves you. God loves you.
So love Him back!!
I suppose you could say today that some follow Luther, others follow Calvin, others follow Wesley...etc. But I don't think that's the way it should be. There's a reason we're called Christians!
Well anyway, that's something for me (and you too, perhaps) to ponder on.
Changing the subject...I feel rather like life for me is a series of revelations (of varying significance). Like about six months ago I realised that leaps of faith are really, really worth it (I'll have to tell that story sometime I guess) and that I'm incredibly weak when I try to rely on myself -- but when I lean on God He makes me incredibly powerful. (I had to relearn that lesson a couple of times, but I think it's getting through to me now. :) ) My most recent "revelation" or life lesson is that God really loves me.
If you're a Christian and you know that I'm a Christian you're probably thinking, "Well, duh." And of course I already knew that God loves me. In my mind. But I guess I still felt like I had to be completely perfect, and that's a heavy weight to carry. I was getting stressed out over really tiny things in my effort to please God -- and basically going about it completely the wrong way. Not surprisingly, this lead to a somewhat severe case of discouragement. I was pretty miserable for a while, but on Boxing day I decided that filling my mind with escapist-fuel wasn't going to help anything and so went off by myself to wrestle this thing out. After a not-very-refreshing bout of tears, I started praying rather brokenly --
Oh man, I really am giving you my diary here.
Oh well, I guess I should finish the story. I started praying, but all I could say was "What am I supposed to do?" because I felt like I was falling far short of being a good Christian and everything. I was just saying this over and over, but then I felt as though I was given the answer: Nothing. You don't have to do anything.
Well, it's not like I heard an audible voice or anything, but I got the message clearly enough. And I was pretty amazed. I mean, here I was, beating myself up over stupid little things and trying to be Miss Perfect because I thought that's what I had to do, and here God's telling me, "Relax! I already love you!"
Yeah, I did know that, but I guess it never really got past my mind and to my heart, you know what I mean? Anyway, to make a long story short, I realised I had been acting like a legalistic idiot, trying to do everything on my own strength (told you I had to relearn that lesson a few times!) and that I was trying to be perfect for the wrong reason. It came clear to me that although, yes, I should try to live righteously, I should do it not out of obligation but out of love for God and a genuine desire to please Him. (Yeah, I hear you Christians saying "Yeah, duh" again, but remember that things aren't always so obvious when they're happening to you!) And I found that that's exactly what I wanted to do -- because (partly because He had revealed all this to me and had taken away the pressure I had been under, but mostly because He LOVED me -- *HAPPY FACE!!!!*) , I found I really loved God too.
So I'm really happy at the moment. (I know I won't stay on this high forever, but I really think that what I've learned is something that won't disappear even with the ups and downs of a teenager's emotional balance.) I'm really enjoying putting the command "whatever you do, do it to the glory of God" into practice, and I'm just loving God loving me (and I think He loves me loving Him too).
So I guess if I was to say anything to you lucky people who got to READ MY DIARY IN ALL IT'S EMOTIONAL DRAMA AND PAINFUL HONESTY, it would be this: God loves you. God loves you. God loves you. God loves you.
So love Him back!!
Monday, November 19, 2007
Sense & sensibility and all that jazz
I've been thinking about the differences between reformed churches, like the reformed Baptist church I go to, and other denominations like Pentecostal churches. It seems that reformed churches tend to put a greater emphasis on the mind and and intellectual stuff like systematic theology and all that, while the others tend to put greater emphasis on feelings and evangelism.
That's my theory anyway -- I don't know enough about Pentecostal churches etc to tell for sure. But I was thinking how it's a pity that the two sides remain so separate. I think an ideal church would not place more emphasis on either intellectualism or feelings, but rather balance the two -- the head and the heart. Each by themselves tends to lead to extremes, but together they balance each other.
It struck me that it was kind of funny -- although perhaps not surprising -- that I was thinking this. If I was to pick a word to describe myself, "balanced" might be it. I am both a very logical and a very imaginative type of person, so I think my head and heart balance each other quite nicely. Which I must say is rather comfortable!
Anyway, what I would really like to see is reformed churches taking on the passion and other good qualities of the Pentecostal churches (etc) and vice versa. I think the denominations should not be so stand-off-ish of one another but join together to balance each other out, working together as the body of Christ.
That's what we should be doing, after all.
That's my theory anyway -- I don't know enough about Pentecostal churches etc to tell for sure. But I was thinking how it's a pity that the two sides remain so separate. I think an ideal church would not place more emphasis on either intellectualism or feelings, but rather balance the two -- the head and the heart. Each by themselves tends to lead to extremes, but together they balance each other.
It struck me that it was kind of funny -- although perhaps not surprising -- that I was thinking this. If I was to pick a word to describe myself, "balanced" might be it. I am both a very logical and a very imaginative type of person, so I think my head and heart balance each other quite nicely. Which I must say is rather comfortable!
Anyway, what I would really like to see is reformed churches taking on the passion and other good qualities of the Pentecostal churches (etc) and vice versa. I think the denominations should not be so stand-off-ish of one another but join together to balance each other out, working together as the body of Christ.
That's what we should be doing, after all.
Monday, November 12, 2007
Hello world, welcome to my diary
Well. I must say, it's a tad scary, having a blog for the first time. Like publishing my diary or something. THE WHOLE WORLD CAN READ MY DIARY!!!
Except somehow I don't think the world is that interested.
Anyway, this blog isn't just going to be a diary and a place for my friends to get to know me better. It'll also be my soapbox where I can express my opinions and share my life lessons.
Watch this space. I'll post more soon.
Except somehow I don't think the world is that interested.
Anyway, this blog isn't just going to be a diary and a place for my friends to get to know me better. It'll also be my soapbox where I can express my opinions and share my life lessons.
Watch this space. I'll post more soon.
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